Growing up, our Christmases were steeped in tradition—family gatherings with parents and grandparents, Christmas Eve on one side, Christmas Day on the other. There was always food, music, laughter, and that wonderful feeling of belonging. Over the years, life has shifted—our kids are grown, families live farther apart, and even health and travel have changed what holidays look like. This year, our celebration looks a little different too. In this episode, Greg and I reflect on how to find meaning when traditions change, how to create new rhythms that fit this season of life, and how to hold on to what truly matters most.
When holidays no longer look the same, how do we preserve what matters most? How do we hold on to connection, meaning, and belonging when the traditional picture changes?
This article explores how to rethink holiday traditions with intention, creativity, and grace. Whether your family is navigating distance, loss, new marriages, or simply a new season of life, there are ways to preserve what’s essential while creating fresh rhythms that fit today.
Changes That Occur
- Geography: Distance makes gathering harder than simply driving across town.
- Health & Mobility: Surgeries, chronic conditions, and aging affect participation.
- Expanded Family Circles: Marriage brings in-laws, doubling the holiday schedule.
- Cultural Shifts: Technology, careers, and lifestyles scatter families further.
- Emotional Realities: Loss, strained relationships, or simply different expectations change how holidays feel.
Setting Broad Goals
- How can we honor these goals even if the format is new?
- How can we make family members feel connected even if they can’t be physically present?
- What would make this year a “win,” even if it looks different from years past?
Creative Ideas for New Traditions and Thoughtful Gifts
Here are ways you can reinterpret traditions in fresh, meaningful ways: (get free download here)
A. The “You Belong With Us” Card
This heartfelt idea involves creating a custom holiday card declaring the message everyone longs to hear: “You belong with us.” Even if a loved one can’t travel, receiving a physical reminder of connection makes distance feel smaller.
I often use Canva to create these cards, but simple handwritten notes work beautifully too.
B. Care Packages with Shared Gifts
Send a small box in advance that includes:
- 3–4 miniature gifts from different family members
- A shared family photo (or a fun collage with each person’s individual picture)
- A note or token related to a shared memory
- A “do not open until our call” instruction
- This becomes a shared moment on Zoom or FaceTime, making the virtual gathering feel more communal and interactive.
C. Family Music Moments
For families who love singing or playing instruments, you can create a simple musical moment together over video:
- Everyone chooses a favorite carol
- Someone leads from the piano or guitar
- Kids play whatever they can—even if it sounds like Greg’s memory of “Sleigh Ride” in trumpet trio form!
- Music binds hearts together. It’s not about perfection; it’s about participation.
D. Themed “Elf Badges”
Create playful badges that assign each person a fun “elf role”:
- Food Elf
- Song Elf
- Home Repair Elf
- Memory Keeper Elf
- Joy Elf
- Game Elf
- It sparks laughter and gets everyone involved—even if they’re online.
E. A Tradition of “Hard-to-Open” Gifts
We started a tradition of giving our sons puzzle boxes or creative packaging for gifts like money or small items. Each year the challenge changes:
- Puzzle boxes
- Helium balloons with money inside
- Hidden clues or riddles
- Envelopes disguised inside larger boxes
- This builds anticipation and gives everyone a fun story to share later.
F. Food Traditions Delivered to Their Door
Send ingredients or gift cards for a shared meal from afar—like the prime beef that became a Johnson family favorite. Even if families can’t gather physically, they can share the same special dish.
G. Memory Sharing Time
Make storytelling a tradition. Each person shares:
- A funny holiday memory
- A meaningful moment from childhood
- A story that has grown “bigger” over time (as family stories always do!)
- These conversations create warmth, laughter, and continuity.
H. Holiday Morning Rituals—Reimagined
Cherished traditions like Belgian waffles on Christmas morning can still be honored, even if not everyone is present. Consider:
- Sharing your recipe
- Sending a waffle mix or toppings
- Doing a “virtual waffle breakfast” together
- Keeping the essence of the tradition alive—even in a new form—maintains connection.
How to Communicate a Sense of Belonging
Above all, belonging is the heart of holiday traditions. It’s the antidote to loneliness and the foundation of family connection—whether emotional, spiritual, or relational. So how do you help someone feel they belong, especially when they can’t be physically present?
Here are some guiding principles inspired by the conversation:
A. Say It Out Loud
Sometimes the most powerful words are the simplest:
- “You belong with us.”
- “We miss you.”
- “You’re an important part of our family.”
- “We wish you were here, but we’re so glad we get to share this moment with you.”
Never underestimate the impact of saying what someone needs to hear.
B. Plan Ahead
Belonging grows when people feel anticipated. Small acts like mailing a gift early or preparing a creative surprise communicate intentional love.
C. Adapt Without Apology
If someone can’t travel due to illness, distance, or life obligations, accept this reality without guilt or pressure. Replace disappointment with creativity. The mindset matters as much as the method.
D. Involve Everyone
Even a simple assignment like sharing a memory, choosing a song, or wearing an “elf badge” gives each person a role.
E. Keep Tradition Alive, Even in New Form
Whether it’s food, music, games, or gift-opening rituals, continuity helps connect past and present.
F. Make Room for Laughter
Not everything will go perfectly. In fact, some of the “failures” become the best memories. The key is to stay flexible and enjoy the moment.
G. Don’t Give Up on Family
I wholeheartedly emphasize this. Even when it’s hard—even when relationships feel strained or circumstances shift—family is worth investing in. It takes work, planning, and patience, but the payoff is connection across generations.
Conclusion: Embrace the "New," Honor the "True"
When holidays don’t look the same, it’s tempting to mourn what’s missing. But there is beauty—and even opportunity—in reimagining traditions with purpose. What matters most is not the perfectly set table, the travel schedule that aligned just right, or the nostalgic traditions exactly as they once were. What matters is connection. Belonging. Faith. Warmth. Laughter. And the intentional love that says:
“You are part of us, no matter where you are.”
In this season, may you find fresh ways to honor your past, adapt to your present, and create new traditions that carry your family forward with love.
Additional Resources
Women at Halftime: Principles for Producing Your Successful Second Half by Deborah Johnson
Power of After: What’s Next Can Be Your Most Purposeful Chapter by Deborah Johnson
FREE Downloads: Goal Setting Worksheets
FREE Resources and links: https://GoalsForYourLife.com/DJWorks
YouTube Podcast Playlist: Women at Halftime/Power of After
- about Greg & Deb
GREG joins DEBORAH as a co-host on Power of After Show (formerly Women at Halftime Podcast)
GREG JOHNSON is a former professional athlete, a triple A relief-pitcher with the Cleveland Indians (now Guardians) He also has years of experience in sales and as an R.I.A. (Registered Investment Advisor), owning his own business. He & Deb met on a blind date and have been married over 40 years.
Holidays are ultimately about celebrating faith, honoring family, and reinforcing a sense of belonging—even if the expression of those values transforms over time.
deborah johnson
Thought Leader, Keynote Speaker, Author
If you are interested in growing and learning, check out our online courses here: Online Learning
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