October 9

Guilty of the Blame Game?

Guilty of the Blame Game?

By Deborah Johnson

October 9, 2017

Fear, healthy habits, mindsets, personal development, positive self talk

Guilty of the Blame Game?

Why do people play the blame game by blaming others, even when what happened was totally their fault? Part of the reason people blame others for a plan gone wrong is fear of consequences. Consequences can include embarrassment, loss of position or even punishment.

One of the instances I’m still not proud of is when I denied my involvement in a prank. This happened many years ago, but insinuated the blame on my best friend after dropping a rock on a neighbor boy’s head from a second story balcony. (watch short video above)

But No One Saw It!

The reason I could deny my involvement was that no one could really see that I did it. I also didn’t fully think through the consequences of dropping a rock from a second story balcony. How did I know it would cause the boy’s head to bleed so profusely?

After it happened, I was petrified and ran back inside. When all us kids were asked later about what happened, I denied this over and over and kept looking at my friend. By doing so, I did get out of any punishment at the time, but I can still remember the incident, which shows how guilty I felt!

Thoughts of Denial

I will guarantee that many of you also have first thoughts of denial when a plan doesn’t come off as expected. The danger is that if a person is not able to grow in personal responsibility and maturity, playing the blame game by blaming others could become a habitual response for most situations.

If you find yourself blaming others more than taking responsibility, take the time now to do a little soul searching to discover why. Maybe you had an episode like mine, dropping a rock and still carry that fear of the consequences. It’s important to now move past that fear.

7 Steps to Move Past Fear

1) Develop HEALTHY FEAR.Healthy fear also buys you extra time, holding you back from hasty decisions before moving forward. 
2) Define what you are FEELING. 
3) Name the WORST THING that can happen. 
4) Write a different POSITIVE OUTCOME for at least one of your fears. 
5) MOVE if you are frozen and immobilized. 
6) Keep moving with PURPOSEFUL RESOLUTION. 
7) Define a POSITIVE GOAL to gain momentum.

Are You Prepared?

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DEBORAH JOHNSON: Providing tools and inspiration to gain momentum and get unstuck in life. Speaking, Concerts, In-Depth Workshops. Most recent book Bad Code: Overcoming Bad Mental Code That Sabotages Your Life! You can reach Deborah the following ways:Twitter:@DebJohnsonWorks • YouTube ; Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/deborah.johnson; Websites: https://GoalsForYourLife.com; https://DJWorksMusic.com

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Deborah Johnson

About the author

DEBORAH JOHNSON, M.A., creator of Hero Mountain® and former president of Los Angeles National Speakers Association, is an international award-winning music artist, author, speaker and National Media Commentator. Deborah provides tools to create your ideal lifestyle and work during the halftime of life, getting unstuck. You can live your second half fulfilled, focused and free! Up for multiple GRAMMY Awards and spending over 20 years in the entertainment industry, she's an expert on how to constantly reinvent yourself in a gig-economy. She is also the recipient of the 2018 Women's Economic Forum Exceptional Women of Excellence Award. Deborah is the author of four books and speaks and performs in both live and virtual events.

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